15 Thoughts I Had About the ‘Succession’ Season 3 Trailer

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Just as I was contemplating what would occupy 90% of my mental real estate now that the Gossip Girl reboot is almost here, HBO came through for me again, dropping the trailer for season three of everyone’s other favorite show about rich sociopaths: Succession.

Obviously, I had thoughts (chief among them: why does it feel like I’ve been waiting approximately one decade for this season of television), and they’re enumerated below. Let’s dive in, shall we?

  1. Kendall Roy is talking to himself in a mirror! My scary friend is back!
  2. Shiv. In. Suit. We don’t get to see the pants, but I’m sure they’re great.
  3. Jeremy Strong in a baseball hat has such powerful “boy-king CEO at the start-up who strategically remembers his employee’s names to make them feel valued” energy.
  4. “He’s our dad, but he was going to send me to jail. He’d do the same to all of us,” opines Kendall, and…yeah, I don’t know how another season of everyone wondering whether Logan sucks or not is going to play out. Spoiler, guys: He sucks.
  5. Okay, there are Shiv’s pants! A camel slack, not too shabby.
  6. I’m getting the vibe that a lot of this season will be about Shiv, which I am more than okay with.
  7. Roman!
  8. Did Shiv just…spit on a book? Marry me.
  9. Ah, there’s the Cousin Greg and Tom banter I came for. Why do all of these two men’s interactions make me laugh harder than anything else on TV?
  10. Oh, shit, there are people protesting Logan Roy.
  11. Tom having a meltdown on a copy machine is something I don’t even need explained to me. I’m just thrilled it’s happening.
  12. A desk flipping before the end of minute one! Run Teresa Giudice her money, please.
  13. Logan’s way of talking on a cell phone—i.e., basically just holding it to his mouth—is so, so accurate of old rich guys, which you know if you’ve ever been in line behind one at a Starbucks.
  14. Love when my dad says he’s “going to grind your bones to make my bread.” Very normal. Not terrifying at all.
  15. The last joke of the trailer is so funny I’m not even going to try to reproduce it; you just need to watch it yourself. Hurry up, HBO!

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